How to Create a Home that fills you with Peace Part 1

We all need a home that fills us with Peace. This couldn’t be more true now, (at the time of this writing, our Country is in the midst of Quarantine to stop the Coronavirus).

I don’t know when we lost sight of what home really means but I feel we have. Was it lost in the busy-ness of two parents working full time jobs and kids overrun with afterschool activities? Perhaps it was when we, as a Country, started living beyond our means. Was it when we stopped leaning on Community, and socializing with our neighbors?

Regardless of when and how, I believe we are moving to a place of just going through the motions day after day. Home is a place to grab a quick bite, change clothes and move on.

That’s why time flies by so quickly. John Lennon said it best when he said “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” I think the Danish term “Hygge” is the answer to fully enjoying our life and home. Have you heard of “Hygge” (pronounce Hoo-gah)? I’ve done some research on that and would love to share my findings. This is going to be a long post so it will be a two part-er. When you’re done with this post, go here for Part 2.

From what I’ve read, Hygge is difficult to define. One definition that I feel really encompasses the true meaning is: Hygge is a Danish word for developing a mood of coziness and comfort. It’s about creating feelings of wellness and Contentment.

Kind of sounds like what I believe the definition of “Home” is. Not house, Home. However, the Merrium-Webster definition of home is “of, relating to, or being a place of residence, place of origin, base of operations the company’s home office“.

Wow. Makes me want to live there. Not really. I prefer to make my home Hygge–or”Hyggefy” it. I think we all should adopt that term for our home.

But how do I create that feeling within my own four walls? Today, I want to talk about creating feelings of Wellness and Contentment. Part 2 will be about coziness and comfort.

First of all let me say, like it or not, as women and moms, we set the tone for our homes. It’s true, if Momma ain’t happy, no ones’ happy. Have you noticed that? So if we’re stressed, yelling, a mess, disorganized and don’t clean up after ourselves, what does that teach everyone else in the house? I know. One more thing to add to our stress. But seriously, is that the message you want to convey to your family and guests?

Sit for a moment. Close your eyes. Imagine the feeling you want everyone (including yourself) who walks through your door to feel. I want calm, peace, a sense of comfort and belonging. And some fun thrown in for good measure! So Change YOUR mood and eventually, it will change the mood of your home. . . but how?

The point is try to figure out what stresses you most and find a solution. It will go a long way to improving your mood and the mood of your home. Do you walk in the door stressed most days? Why? Is it b/c you’re tired? Work too many hours? Your house is a mess? You need a vacation? You need to exercise? You don’t know what’s for dinner? You have laundry spilling out into the mudroom? (true story) Truly, all of these can be addressed.

Make sure you are taking care of YOU. Get good sleep. Take a vitamin. Work out. It doesn’t mean you have to run a marathon. Try out some different work outs and find one you truly love. You’ll stick with it. But do something for you. Every Day. Get some sunshine. Remember, you are the one who should be taking THE BEST care of you!! You are important!

Mealtime always stressed me out, so I started watching some Youtube videos and focused on putting together a couple meal plans. If you’d ever like to hear about that, I’d love to do a post on it. I found a way to simplify grocery shopping and meal plans (and finding foods my kids will eat!! YEAH!) and it has been a lifesaver. I’m still tweaking it, but when I am able to stick to it, it does wonders for my sense of calm. Honestly just three words used to raise my blood pressure. “WHAT’S FOR DINNER?” Who knew meal time could be so stressful! I love food!

Laundry was another issue. I had to play around with my laundry routine a little but I think I’ve finally found one that makes it manageable. I no longer spend my entire Saturday doing laundry! And honestly, I don’t even think it takes me as long to complete as it did when I was spending one whole day. I’d be happy to share what I’ve learned about that as well. Just drop me a comment.

Do you find you have to yell a lot to make your point? I hate to admit but this was me. I just wanted some cooperation but you know what? That didn’t make anyone cooperate.

The solution? Deep breathing and Meditation TRULY helped me find a way to calm myself before it got to the point of yelling. Eventually I started remaining more calm throughout the day. Not perfect, but more calm. And everyone responds better to someone who is reasonable and calm.

YouTube has a lot of Meditation videos and calming music. I’m no expert but I just started slow, with 2 minutes in a quiet room with a timer and some ocean waves and worked my way up. Give yourself Grace. It’s hard. And you likely won’t see results right away but don’t give up. In a couple weeks you’ll notice a sense of Peace and calm overcome you. And when you start to get stressed, you can recall the calm in a way you couldn’t before. Meditation. Promise it works!

These are a couple of the intangible ways you can increase the level of Peace in your home. Since Peace is a feeling, I think these are the most important. But they are not necessarily the easiest.

I’m still working on Hygge. But I can tell you, I notice a difference in my family. When I don’t get stressed, they don’t get stressed. If I start the day smiling and in a good mood–guess what? That is contagious. And when I’ve had a bad day, I need to step back and take some deep breathes and realize, I’m where I need to be to relax. Close the door and leave that stressful world outside, and step into rest and calm, peace and Hygge.

In Part 2, I will share some more tangible ideas that create peace and calm and coziness and contentment in your home. How to deal with Physical Chaos and the fun part of how Decor can cultivate calm.

Meanwhile, I hope you practice some of the ideas I mentioned above. I would love for the most important thing to come out of this time of Quarantine to be to learn to love the home we’re in and at the end of a long day, know we’re exactly where we want to be.